Apocalypse, CA – Attack Of The 50 Inch Wide Mole

Quick Thoughts: Apocalypse, CA (2011)

I’m having trouble finding a film from Djibouti for the series, so, for now, we’re going to be looking at an independent American film that was partially shot in Djibouti (according to IMDb).

A pretty terrible movie. A few degrees from insufferable, this has some redeeming elements that are more or less smothered by poor dialogue, childish writing and, worst of all, depressingly mediocre performances. These downfalls harmonise quite well, creating numerous repellent sequences that had me on the edge of my seat – not in suspense, but ready to walk away. I got through this movie, however. The cinematography and special effects helped as they were surprisingly good, and I counted two amusing moments. Moreover, the direction, whilst not particularly imaginative, was competent. Beyond this, to get through Apocalypse, CA you have to trudge along a poorly realised body swap story, one populated with a plethora of childish ideas that all of those involved didn’t have the balls to take the distance, meshed with a cliched end of the world narrative.

The one redeeming element of Apocalypse, CA is that much of the stupidity that is imbued into this plot is done with rhyme and reason. In such, this is, in a way, a twist on the Beauty and the Beast story whereby a naive young man makes a rude blunder that defines him as he grows into an adult and threatens to end his life as he’s young if he does not confront his conflicts. Moreover, this blunder concerns a woman and later involves some kind of witch that turns him into a female, and so it is his tainted conception of females that is challenged. Specifically in this movie, the main character is made to believe that a girl who he knew and once rejected in school has a mole on her clitoris. For this, he could never bring himself to be with her. And this is the core of the movie – as ridiculous as that sounds. Whether or not this is a lie, whether or not our main character can reconcile with females and confront his past, is the fundamental conflict of this movie and it materialises itself through a giant woman (probably a reference to Attack Of The 50 Foot Woman–maybe Dude, Where’s My Car?), the mentioned body swapping, male and female sex pills and a giant meteorite hurtling towards Earth, its central impact point being our main character’s mum’s house.

I won’t go into arduous detail in explaining this film, but suffice to say that a smart narrative is almost constructed. It is unfortunate that the acting and writing hold this movie down. Maybe if it wasn’t so full of tropes and didn’t try to be funny it could have worked a little better. With all of that said, how enticing does this one sound? Have you watched it? Will you watch it? What are your thoughts?



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